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The Business of Personal Relationships/ Jane Beaudry —1st ed.
1. Where Do Our Choices and Truths Really Come From?
2. Not So Uncommon
3. What Is Your Reality?
4. Why Ask for Help?
5. Full Potential Highest Self
6. Is Something Holding You Back?
7. It’s All About You, Relationship with Yourself
8. Correcting Your Past, Giving Yourself Permission to Be the Catalyst
9. Coming to America
10. How You Treat Yourself Is How the World Treats You
11. Your Conscious Mind
12. Your Subconscious Mind
13. Putting the Conscious and Subconscious Together
14. You Can Get Results Faster!
This book is dedicated to those who appreciate what it takes to be a true leader and master executive excellence . . . who are willing to help the world
around them for the greater good of all.
We’ve all had bosses and have been under the influence of “leaders.” Some, if you’re lucky enough, made a positive difference in your life and in the organization that they were charged with leading. Others perhaps left scars on you and on their organization, holding both back from higher potential. Either way, healing can take place. Whether you are aware of it or not, your Full Potential Highest Self has always been within you and can be awakened. . . even if you’ve never met your complete true self, even if what you’re reading seems impossible right now.
What is your Full Potential Highest Self? Much like within each seed is the full, natural, and magnificent potential of a plant when tended to and allowed to flourish, within nature, science, quantum physics, psychology, behavior, and spirituality is the energy of life. You too came into this life with all the potential that when tended to you could become; it’s innate, even if you’ve never experienced it. The reason it sounds foreign is because the society we were born into doesn’t acknowledge its own Full Potential Highest Self, so how could it recognize it in you when you were born? Its no one’s fault. At the same time, it’s still available and you can have access to it.
I have been asked for years to write this book. Many people wanted me to tell their story of transformation from the work we did together. When you’re busy helping people, it’s tough to find the time to write such a book. In fact, I started writing a similar book around five years ago. But this particular book has come about because I realized there is a specific group of people who I wanted to influence the most . . . the leaders, the doers, the achievers, and the influencers on this planet. These are often businesspeople at the top of their field, or perhaps political influencers, or entertainers, who wanted to achieve more and also improve the world beyond themselves.
Leaders come in many forms and often feel isolated, as they are looked upon as supposedly being or having to be perfect. It’s true that they are often the smartest person in the room. At the same time, they too are human with not only a brilliant mind, but also patterns that are sometimes unhelpful, making them less effective than they could otherwise be.
Perfectionism is a double-sided sword. One side pushes one to grow and become more accomplished and successful, often setting an example of what might be possible for others. The other side of perfectionism is frequently an experience of worry, overwhelming anxiety or massive stress, a suffering through of life wherein there’s no such thing as satisfaction or self-acceptance, even with “success” for themselves and others.
How many perfect people have you met? (Seriously!) I suspect none. Not even you, if you’ll let your guard down long enough to tell yourself the truth. So how can it be that accomplished college presidents, C-suite leaders, entertainers, political figures, religious leaders, and the like feel “less than”? Or that they are not good enough and then find themselves turning to a life of perfectionism that ultimately causes anxiety, criticism, sometimes depression, unhealthy choices, and more?
I wrote The Business of Personal Relationships because we’ve been lied to by the misunderstandings and misperceptions from history and from our early childhood with unhelpful messages from ourselves and our environment that turn into unconscious limiting and controlling beliefs. We lie to ourselves about ourselves, to those around us, and about what’s possible. The lies become filters through which we limit ourselves and our world. This ultimately causes problems with our feelings, reactions, relationships, and the bottom line. The first problem is that you don’t even realize that you are lying to yourself or that others are lying to themselves or you. I’m not saying this is intentional or conscious. We all know it’s easy to be misunderstood or surprised to discover that we have misunderstood others (although you may hate to, or rarely, admit it). It’s a common trait for humans to assume that we are right; leaders are no exception. You may not have learned that when we unknowingly don’t have accurate or complete information, our minds want to automatically fill in the blanks with data that is not always helpful, much less accurate. It’s call projection. Perhaps you’ve heard the more recent research that most people make up their mind about us within the first three seconds. It’s easy to judge and be misjudged.
How can someone possibly know you, or you know them, in three seconds? Many people live a lifetime and don’t even know themselves as much as they assume they do. How can we when 90% of our brain is the unconscious or subconscious? Does this describe you or someone you know? Do you find yourself feeling frustrated with your profession or in your personal life? Do you struggle with emotions that cause conflict in yourself or others? Do you want to blame the world around you when others don’t agree with you or see life the way you do? Are you a perfectionist? Controlling? Angry? Isolated in a sea of people?
This book will help you to understand yourself and those around you in a less speculative way and will make understanding and listening easier, no matter the relationship.
Where Do Our Choices and Truths Really Come From?
In the Western world, at least, we’ve been told that we all have choice. However, it is rare that any one of us actually exhibits authentic true choice. You may want to argue with me right now, but please take a moment to consider the following: What seems like choice is really a reflection of your prior environmental exposure, coupled with your unique and limited perception and interpretations of life. A straightforward example of your perceived choice is the fact that each person sees life in a way that is uniquely theirs and theirs alone and that is often referred to as “common sense.” What seems like common sense to you is different to everyone else. Consequently, most people mistakenly believe that their perception is the truth. So, who’s right?
As we talk about facts or truth, we are more frequently influenced by our unconscious programs and The Business of Personal Relationships patterns that are, in reality, a compilation of the unique meaning we give or get from our environment and our experiences. These influences are embedded into our belief system by the age of ten and beginning as early as the third month in our mother’s womb.
The chapters in this book offer examples of how very smart people, like you, and who are often thought of as being at the top of their game, got unstuck from their unconscious blocks and were able to move to a state of freedom by discovering How to Utilize Every Tool Available to Increase Profit, Productivity, and Peace of Mind by Uncovering Your Full Potential Highest Self. The names of my clients shared herein have been changed to protect their privacy.
Each chapter includes facts and stories that you can perhaps relate to. And just maybe you have some secrets or unresolved issues that your position at the top makes it hard for you to talk about. And then there’s the challenge of how to get those unresolved issues resolved. Let me assure you that you are not stuck with no place to turn. You can become free of those patterns that do not serve you and maybe never did. The benefits will be priceless and you can become free! You can become the connected leader because you will be able to safely connect with yourself and release whatever is holding you back, whether you’re aware of it or not. You know that “feeling,” don’t you? After all, even you are human! Wouldn’t it be nice to feel good being human?
Ultimately, wouldn’t it be transformative to discover a powerful and balanced being inside yourself that could support you in expressing your Full Potential Highest Self for the rest of your life? You can!